早上起来喝了杯开水，就开始听失恋者的述说，直到12点半肚子饿的实在不行就开口直说给我时间吃点东西先。。。。。。“为什么她要这样残忍？”“为什么她要说这些无情的话？”“她居然相信我说的话，难道我会那么无情吗？”“现在我的心就象刀割一样”“肥鹅，我好想哭。。。”“我做错了吗？”“我应该怎么做啊？教教我啊”哎，自从大四的哪个失恋高峰期以来，好久没听过那么撕心裂肺和心如刀割的痛拉，对于没受过伤的我真的不明白为什么既然那么深爱对方却要那么残忍的去伤害彼此呢？爱不是只要对方幸福就行了吗，为什么一定要拥有呢？爱不是要去接受和包容对方的优缺点吗，为什么一定要对方为了自己而改变呢？爱一个人不是要对方知道一个真正的自己吗？为什么要说她满足不了我的要求，我也满足不了她的要求？有要求就不是一种单纯的爱吧？（但是矛盾的是当你看上对方时其实是哪个人拥有你欣赏的地方，那已经是一种要求了）还有爱情应该没有对与错，应该不应该的吧，只有适合与不适合，如果不适合，勉强在一起只会夺走对方的幸福。为什么不放手呢？为什么都要把对方逼得以后都不想再恋爱呢？或许我的爱不够深吧，我只觉得如果对方找到一个更适合的，那么不用担心我，我会心甘情愿的退出，只要你幸福就好了，只是在被判死刑的时候要告诉我一声，不要等到结婚那一刻才告诉我你要结婚了。。。
聊到两点多，干脆放自己一天的假，不做正事，发了Ｎ封ＥＭＡＩＬ给好友们，然后刚好把我网络弄地瘫痪的凶手出去玩几天，我就疯狂的上ＹＯＵＴＵＢＥ，觉得东西真的不能一直拥有，这样得到时会更加珍惜，就象现在我可以上网看ＶＥＤＩＯ和ＵＰＬＯＡＤ相片那样。看回了很多周星驰电影和广告的搞笑片段，还有麦兜的，简直就是笑到快要停止呼吸，特别是看回“麦兜看医生”的哪个片段，笑到狂拍桌子，黄秋生和吴君如的配音，厉害厉害！后来干脆重新看了一遍电影《春田花花同学会》，已经三个多月没看电影拉，而且一直觉得现在不是看电影的时候（哈哈，我在秘密地为某件事而努力着，每天时间表很满），又有一次新的体会，觉得每次重新看一部电影或者一本书就有新的体会。印象最深刻的依然是那一句“如果社会栋梁不穿裤子，打鬲或者。。。那还算不算社会栋梁啊？”还有就是终于想起新来的ＢＡＲＭＡＮ有一种余文乐ＦＥＥＬ拉，怪不得那么熟悉。。。看来我真的厉害很多了，人家那边失恋那么痛苦，我却一边想办法开导（只能引导他去看清内心想要的），但一边继续自己的娱乐，因为每个人都有自己的路要走，担心也担心不来，两个人的事我这个外人又不能乱给意见。哈，发现一个挺有趣的发泄方法，就是朋友时不时会发些乱七八糟的句子过来，原来他为了发泄情绪在乱敲键盘，敲完就狂哈哈哈哈。。。
然后打了几个电话，鸿珠终于请了假下个周末会过来，而刚好三个星期前ＡＬＡＮ已经约好了，鸿珠干脆叫我不要去ＬＥＩＣＥＳＴＥＲ叫ＡＬＡＮ过来，她请客，哈哈。玲玲听到了也想星期一请假过来，更搞笑的是她说顺便叫连请假过来，我当然说好拉，请假去玩是一件很爽的事！（但是我知道她们肯定来不了的了）然后就想到了ＭＩＣＨＥＬＥ，发了ＥＭＡＩＬ也叫她过来（不过估计等她看到ＥＭＡＩＬ时已经过了好久罗）。下个星期，好期待啊！
之后洁文打电话过来，晕，手割得很深，血止不了，于是告诉她农村最土的方法，她开始不敢相信，但是根据我的经验跟她说虽然用止血贴暂时止住了，但事实上几个小时后打开，血还是会狂喷，结果跟预料一样，于是她就老老实实的按照我的方法去做，哈，止住了。。。这两天让我觉得年龄不是个问题，人是需要依赖与安抚。。。
最后出门的那一刻才发觉自己还没刷牙，洗脸（一边打电话一边换工作服，真服了自己拉，好能说啊！）。。。原来下过一场大雨，刚好雨过天晴，好漂亮的天空和好舒服的空气啊！活着是多么的美好啊！

今天又晚睡了，但是不写下来估计也睡不了好觉的。最近下班的比较晚，想不到今天晚上十二点左右洁文还打电话过来（她一般都是8，9点打给我，然后一聊就两三个小时），原来她7点多才搬到伦敦（找到工作也在伦敦）感到寂寞，所以要找个心里安抚，于是又聊了差不多一个小时。由于她的人生经验都比我丰富的多，而且懂得也很多，她对事情都有自己一套看法，况且本人对事一向不求甚解，知道有个大概就行了，所以一般如果她心里对什么事情有抵触或者抵抗的话，我硬要说道理是没用的，完全没说服力，所以就就讲讲一个人的生活情况和现在所做的努力。当她听到我说一个人的生活很健康，每天吃饭准时，而且一定做饭吃，然后过的很充实，她就会说整个晚上就这句话最舒服。是她内心很深处的舒服。是啊，其实很多人对事物的看法或者人生观或者性格在某段时间都定在一个点上，要说服一个人不容易，要改变一个人的看法更难，更何况是性格呢？要别人觉得你有说服力，就必需自己也身体力行，自己做到了，不用说别人自然也相信了，正所谓事实胜于雄辩。就象每次都跟家人说我很好啊，不辛苦啊，但是他们总是担心，于是就多照相片给他们看，看到我的笑和状态，就放心多了。慢慢地觉得活着不是一个人的事，无论身在何处，家人或者朋友都会互相影响的。当你们看到我活得很积极时而受到鼓舞的同时，我也觉得我更要活得好好的。
下午跟连聊到她差点忘了下火车，平时感觉不到她特别需要我，因为都是我依赖她，但今天感到有点特殊。。。。。。连，对不起，我帮不了什么，但我知道你也很乐观和积极，我可以做到的是给与你精神上无限的支持。况且我总觉得风浪在短期来说是一种痛，但是长期来说是一件好事，人经过磨练了才变得更坚强和有智慧。有时候突然会觉得自己是大姐姐，因为她神经比较大条，而我是个无敌之敏感的人（只是不表现出来而已）但同时又懂得保护自己（不会轻易给一些无谓的人或者无谓的言论伤害到，觉得不值得，自己觉得这种境界很高，因为我一般都不太在乎别人怎么看，走自己觉得应该走的方向，做自己觉得开心的事，最重要自己内心舒服，别人用奇异的眼光来看，我只认为别人笑我太疯癫，我却笑他人看不穿，我有我的路要走），每次不听我的忠告都吃亏，或许那样渐渐得她也觉得我的叮咛与嘱咐是有道理的，所以最近聊天（每个星期OFF的哪天都轮流和她和玲打电话，现在又多了慈玲，所以我OFF哪个晚上几乎都是在电话聊天）有时候我在讲大道理，她在“恩，哦”，而且我最近想到了一点，在这里暂时是秘密了。
觉得自己很多时候给了很多时间给不在身边的朋友们（这个说起来，我简直就是秘密基地，收藏了太多人的秘密，有时好想说，晕，其实有几个朋友同时遇到的情况很相似，但却又不能叫他们互相诉说）然后就忽略了身边的家人或者朋友，后来慢慢反省，就知道其实要找的英雄就在身边（家人或者朋友，很多都很值得学习），而要自己赋予关注和无限的爱心的是身边的人。。。。。。真的有空要看看有关青少年心理问题的书，连，我想帮点什么。。。（她家里还有别的问题，这个让我深深的感觉到，家庭教育很重要，因为小孩一天一天的长大，到大了，再改就难了。。。）哎，以前会觉得现在连遇到的种种困难，简直就是所有的事都凑在一起，再惨不过了，但是自从四川地震后，我觉得能活着是一件很美好的事，没有什么事情是大不了的，再怎么苦都会过去的，只要坚强与乐观。连，加油！！！！！！！！
还有就是最近有三件事让我深深地体会到老爸说的那句“不要有多少钱就花多少，要留一些做紧急状况时用”。大的那件帮不了，少的那两件很高兴我帮上了忙，但也不敢说，只有连知道。
再还有就是很久之前说过的哪个人还了钱给我和连了，证明我对人的底线的估计是正确的。
P.S. 我爱HAAGEN-DAZS！！！

连没有走之前，以为自己一个人会很难过，谁知， 她走了后，一点寂寞感都没有，或许正如她说，其实她根本就没走，而且事实上我们几乎两个星期见一次面；又或许我每天都把时间表排的满满的，没有时间去想“寂寞”两个字；再或许思念本来就已经深入骨髓，变成了生活的一部分。一个人的生活反而变得更健康，因为怕大家担心。现在连吃饭的速度也放慢了很多，思考的空间也多了。跟朋友的联系就是大家在不同的时空在QQ上留言。虽然打不了中文也收不到表情图片，真的少了很多乐趣，但是风趣的交谈依然在。有时时间一晃就过去了，忘了多久没找过他们了，突然收到说“活着没？”或者说“好想你啊”又或者“什么时候回来？”再者“今年还回来吗？”还有就是“回来吧，这里有你的家人还有我们”都很开心和感动。但这些天来老弟突然问“姐，今年过年还回来么？身体健康么？过得怎样？如果不够钱一定要跟爸说啊。。。”鼻子就酸了。。。还有半年没联系的金莲（她，老温和特首都是我的１２年老朋友拉，而且是在同一个镇里面）说“没关系，朋友们都知道的，我们会等你回来。”当我为这么久没联系而道歉时。这么久没见，金莲依然那么善解人意和体贴，我的鼻子又酸了。。。好想抱抱我的干女儿啊。。。开始为人母应该很不容易吧。。。真的好想看看你看着女儿的那种喜悦。。。

Ｐ.Ｓ. 不用太多的言语，只需在ＥＭＡＩＬ里偶尔的一两句有关生活的话，就已经很满足了，哎，女人，冒救拉！

每次看ECHO的BLOG就觉得她老公好幸福,哇噻,她做的佳肴光是看就垂涎三尺拉,而且样式又多,每当看到时就想但愿我是那一位有口福者.但是今天骑自行车时在想,不是啊,做我老爸更幸福啊,老妈不但做菜好吃,人又贤惠,勤奋,能干,纯朴,善良,脾气又超好,对亲朋戚友都很好,心甘情愿无怨无悔跟老爸熬到今天,很多客人来我家买东西是因为喜欢和老妈聊天,有了老妈,真是夫复何求呢?(搞笑,有一天老妈在帮一个人时,老弟突然跟我说娶老婆就要娶象老妈这样子的,哈哈,我说是啊,然后不要脸的说了一句其实我也不错啊)不过再细想,做我自己更是无敌之幸福啊,有绝世好妈不单止,还有三个世界绝种好男人(爷爷,老爸和老弟),特别是从高中读书要住校开始(注意,这些都是出来深圳之后的),在家我就是公主(以鸿珠的说法就是我熬出头拉),只负责吃,睡,讲电话和看电视,还有就是看门.(其实我在家时间很少拉)在家跟外面简直就是判若两人啊,朋友们都觉得我很勤奋,但老弟总是说我猪(哈哈,有老弟在,会的我也故意装作不会,他看不下去我的做事方式就把全部东西做了,哈哈,我连穿针线都塞给他).看来下一个享福的应该是老爸(爷爷已经在享福拉),因为现在很多家事都是老弟负责,老妈......要灌输她享福的概念不容易啊(老爸有时嫌弃她的固执,我就直接的说世界上只有她才能受得了你的脾气,他就只好说是啊),只能说我们的福就是她的福.
爱你,老妈!

前几天喉咙痛到几乎完全失眠的状态,痛苦到.....睡不好时到早上六七点火气就很盛,整个肚子就象被热的泥浆流侵蚀着,于是狂脚底按摩和腹部按摩,才慢慢缓了过来,百思不得其解,为什么无缘无故吼咙痛呢?我明明天天吃得健康,睡得正常啊.第二天看到隔壁房的才恍然大悟,原来他是罪魁祸首!!!他已经感冒两个星期有多了,开始就直接跟他说保持距离,我抵抗了差......两个星期都没事,还以为自己的抵抗力强多了,谁知......现在想想也难怪啊.哪个人最近买了很多关于登山的配件,上个星期几乎每天都有包裹,呵呵,他又喜欢和我分享,包裹一拆就拿给我看,或者当着我面拆,一起研究研究使用方法,有时还真象个小孩子,在我在厨房时,他就特意跑下来说那东西怎么怎么好用,有个晚上更搞笑,突然背了个专业的登山背包穿着一身运动裤跑下来,害得我以为他要晚上出去探险,不过哪个包真的很不错啊.好晕啊,他连拆一个包装都说要考考我的思维能力...东西怎么用也要考一下,男人,汗!去看烟花(我把全家都叫去了)时,由于没买门票,就只好找找那里有漏洞砖,但是处处都有人守着,开始有个地方我觉得好奇就很高兴的走进去了,后来发觉是看烟花的好地方,但是一进去防守人就发现了,结果被赶走,他居然说我没团队精神,自己一个先闯,而且被发现了没向他们打招呼叫他们撤退,说他自己受过英国军训...晕,那里是人进去都会被发现的拉,况且他们也都进去了,应该看到哪个人转身过来的机率比我高(因为我看到烟花正处于兴奋状态,不可能冷静的拉),哈哈,到最后还是我找到一个既是看烟花的好角度又是一个避雨的好地方(直接叫守门员让我们进去,哈).他还问我去不去埃及,啊,埃及是我从小一直想去的地方啊,只是现在......没钱,没时间和想一起去的朋友都没空.....罢了......
想不到治好吼咙的是DOUBLE VODKA COKE!在上班其间,BARMAN非常相信我的酒量偷偷的给了我酒喝(他好喜欢经常在上班时偷偷地给我喝WISKY,考试那段其间简直就是连逼带诱啊,居然在我要的果汁里放WISKY...但是都给我识穿了,为了时刻保持清醒的头脑,坚持滴酒不沾)后来发觉不痛拉!或许是刚好进入另一阶段吧-打喷嚏,接着鼻子塞,要失眠一两个晚上,然后变声......现在觉得变声虽然声音难听但绝对比喉咙痛好多拉,真的有对比,才知道哪个好咯.
P.S. 老天爷啊,虽然我已经习惯了你的眷顾,但此时此刻也用不着那么胜情吧,风吹的我骑着单车都要圃匐前进,还有,雨也未免下的太大了吧,打的脸好痛咯.害得我好怕发烧,拼命想象如果真的发烧我应该怎样救自己...哇噻,自己一个,没人照顾,意志力和积极的态度,靠你们拉,I没资本病啊......老天爷,帮帮忙,通容通容一下,不要偏在我出门时就雨越下越大,鹅毛细雨还可以勉强接受,小女子在此拜谢了!

  不想写中文了,于是在WINDOWS系统里打了中文再COPY到Mac OS X 系统里......
"WHY ALL OF YOU ASK THE SAME QUESTION?"我问(最近所有朋友QQ留言都问了同一个问题).
"CARE ABOUT YOU"猪特首说.
哈哈,虽然知道会这么说,但这话中听而且爱听.
最近餐厅新来一个BARMAN,人很随和,深受男女同事喜欢,第一天就从他眼中看到"在乎",他对我们的一个女同事应该是一见钟情吧(不,应该说他们俩都),好喜欢看他看着她的眼神,他在酒吧里会时不时搜索她的身影,喜欢那种想把对方尽收眼底的贪婪,喜欢那种情深深的对望(语言在那一刻显得很苍白),喜欢此时此刻眼中只有你的忘我状态.突然想起陈慧林的<对你太在乎>里面的一句歌词"好不好让我在眼里看出你在乎.......",EEEEEEEEE遥遥无期啊.......

P.S. "讲真啊,你吾靓但可爱"7DD无缘无故说了这句话......哈哈,你好采,我比较中意人地讲真话,但是对其他女子就五好甘讲拉,只是讲可爱好拉,未话我五点醒你啊,林下林下(想想)你单身都吾是冒道理啊,BTW,吾记得同你讲,我都一把年纪拉,可爱就五是几适合拉(虽然我有时都觉我块面都几可爱既),下次赞我有女人味拉,绝对可以增强我对你既好感啊.

"Jie, will you be back in this new year?" My younger brother asked.  Actually, i don't know either, really miss home and i think maybe another 2.5 years again since last time be back......Its not a good timing now......trying the best to make the direction clear......really sorry for all the worries, trust me, i will be better and better!

p.s. the feeling of receive friends' messages saying that miss you or want to see you is really very good! hoho, my booking with friends at the moment till 5th July

Finally,done! Hope i can bring good news for everybody no matter how difficult the process is and bring the energy to all of you whom are in difficulties.

  £7.97 a day!!! Oh, goddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

Tonight, i had an hour meeting with the chefs and managers as a translator, its the most exciting translation process i had,  because they talked about the new food, new style and newwwwwwwwwwww my eyes were shining and mouth was smiling, looking forward to eating ..........By the way, since the competitor opens a similar restaurant nearby, Jimmy and Spice's comes up with new idea very frequently to boot the sales(new chicken, Chinese style bowl, new dish, new decoration, new cocktail and new sales skill........), and i am always the first one of the part-time workers to be asked to sell the drinks in a tricky way,ha, when they told me how to do, then i followed it and always succeed and  they always said "good",however, as its a tricky way, i just did it at the first time when they told me how and did as normal after that however, tonight's new plan is good, i think. Each chef should plan their whole week's dishes ,also outline each day's special items and mark down the day of purchase, distinguish everybody's job and responsibility  and low down the waste etc.........xixi, each day also has special cocktail( can i drink??? ooooooo, i drink everything except the bear!)

Finish a small task everyday, feel so satisfied

Also, good to hear Ciling that everything is going to be settled down

P.s. Today one customer did not give the tips to me directly when i brought back the change to her, however, she went to the manager ,taking out £20 notes and asked the manager to give her change , then called the manager to call me in the front of them and gave the tips to me!!!!! hooooooooooooo, so happy even though i won't take that tips on my own but the heart is the most important!!!( I have shared the same tips as the full-time colleagues since last Christmas and £30 more than other part-time workers every two week! Haha, really hope the restaurant be busy this time)

Oh,no, ciling is in the same situation with me and she chooses to bear everything and don't do the cleaning. However, lingling is much poor than us, one unwelcome friend brings lots of luggage and goods proactively living together with her in the small room.......oh,god, how come she always meets soooooooo unexplainable and unreasonable person?eeeeeee, it will totally break down her life and also our meeting plan......ai, its not good to be too nice.......should know how to say "no" and it just hurts ourselves to be too nice.......

Haven't done any exercise for more than 9 months, even though always think health is the most important thing of life. Lefts seems to be weaker and weaker these days and i know just run can heal the pain. Today, i therefore got up at 8am and start to run in the park. Wooooo, the feeling is so nice and love the feeling of stranger saying morning to me My health seems much better than before and didn't feel tired after 30 mins runOh, yeahhhhhhhhh, good habit start now and try to sleep earlier and sleep well No matter what, be healthy and happy!

p.s. thanks a , little boy!( one of housemates, 5 years younger than me, always behaves like a gentleman and i can get a lots of benefits as a lady)! even though its strange that when you said that my hair grew longer(in my memory, no man says my hair growing longer, they normally just say "your hair is very nice" or "i love your hair", compared to those, i would like the longer one),thanks for your care.hehe, its true that younger boy will treat the sister better! (gosh, the elder housemates just like to peach  but won't have any action,so fake........)

haha thought it over two night, finally,i know how to deal with the problem, oh, so clever i am!!!!!

Don't worry, Ma and Pa! I am fine!

...... gosh, information asymmetry,eeeeeeeeee, i should tell everything no matter necessary or not, sorry la ,lian, luckily, you caught the train finally! so selfish i am.......

after finished all the task, went to the cash machine to take some money out, however, money was indeed out but i forgot to take it no mood to stay in Starbucks.........

when people are in trouble, they will encounter more than they can predict......

anyway, finally Lian met Gu's sister and helped her to settle down a lot

Asked Lian to buy a sim card and top it up, also together with Chinese phone card and forced her to meet the younger sister after finishing working(Lian thought that post everything would be alright and no need so urgent to see her, however, i strongly required Lian to see her, even though knew that Lian would be very tired because nobody can help except her, a bit disappointed with younger sister's friend which is in the same college with her and already lives in London for a long time )

The funny thing is that our mobile here could not send message or call her Chinese number, could not find her, so at Chinese midnight, i woke a Gu up to call her and ask her to call us.......

God bless, before working tonight, knew that Lian finally found her, a bit relax.......

However, my heart is still hanging there, i asked the manager to give me off and go to London tomorrow because she said that her english is not good and if asked somebody she   scared that could not understand what they said and ...........

During working, i sneaked into the toilet and called Lian,

"Love, r  u tired?"

"a bit fiat because changed too much underground...."

"Eat?"

"Not  yet..."

"Why don't u eat first, silly!"

"Not hungry yet and in the train now, will eat after back home'

"How is everything?? I already ask off and will come tomorrow'

"You don't need to come la, everything nearly settle down la, save money , save energy and save time! One guy there is very nice and ....... I will bring bed sheet to her tomorrow and .......these days i am not busy and can go to see her often, its no necessary to come...don't ask off..."

"oh,love you so, and bring her together with you on Friday to Birmingham...."

"oh, its a good idea......."

Finally, the hanging heart is released and what i want to say to Lian is" woooooooooo, yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, i love you more than i can say,i love you twice tomorrow!"

P.s. Even though, it rained heavily after finishing working , i was so happy to ride the bike to back home

A friend's younger sister just arrived London on her own, her voice sounds so helpless,really hope i were in London now......Lian, my responsibility will rely on you in the following weeks, hope and believe she will be stronger and stronger! I'll will be there soon!